Journaling the Diabolical
Diabolical—adj— that which is devilish or bearing the character trait of the devil.
As teastained women sojourning through society and time, our power comes not only in being able to walk in that which is “good” but in discerning and operating against what is diabolical: bearing the character traits of the devil and thus able to influence our minds through proximity and interaction. Discerning good from evil is the difference between life lived in vigilance and a life dependent upon stupor. Goodness and the Divine have a dialogue with your spirit towards eternal things, expressed as truth and wisdom and resistance to temptations; while the diabolical corrupts, corrodes and denatures you through the invitation to endless pleasure, the technology of vulgarity, destruction, stealing and yes, killing (remember: traits!). They are at war in your mind, in this world.
The diabolical often masks itself as the opposite, whether through a system like capitalism that claims all can have part of prosperity while blinding to who foots the bill via sweatshops and prison labor— or as a political category like democracy, that pretends its work is bringing equality but speaks the language of bombs, assassinating freedom-fighters, propaganda, fantasy media, installing political puppets, the white nationalist lie of christianity, raping the earth, and genociding indigenous peoples in both hemispheres.
Once we can discern the character of that which is diabolical, we can indict it in our lives and in our journals. But we have been brainwashed against recognizing it. We live in a “democracy”, grew up watching TV without questioning its timing or messages, attended history-eviscerated schools, and went to a church on sundays to praise a god we learned of on these stolen lands. This system told us who was bad and who was good, tailored the imagery and news about protests and serial killers so as to maintain their american dream, and manufactures distraction whenever people begin to stir out of the coma that is that dream. In all, the diabolical is difficult to recognize because in our world, society, and western culture it is considered ABSOLUTELY NORMAL.
In a society where we are disingenuously encouraged to choose good over evil, it is by [diabolical] design that we aren’t taught to discern the layers and mechanisms as to how the diabolical manifests and masquerades. The ease in which we can find ourselves in diabolical situations and vices, along with the wickedness abounding in the world as a whole indicates that the plenary of us are clueless as to the energy and engineering of devilish things. Yet to understand how the diabolical operates is to discern and be vigilant with regards to the character and outcome of anything around you. We live in an EVIL world, and evil has a pattern, a character, and specific set of outcomes: steal, kill and destroy. The wool over our eyes from Christian values patinating societal messaging tells us that the devil manifests in wars and famines and other “major” horrors.
The subtle details that create miseries we’ve grown to view as tolerable or part of life are the very things we must extricate and examine in our journals. We’re not told the devil is the white teacher that withholds a good grade from your son, or the manager who doesn’t tell you that your work is brilliant as you doubt your qualifications. We’re not told that what’s diabolical is the expectation that you will forgive the atrocity of chattel slavery AND never look into the laws that are still informing the de facto miseries of Blackness today. Diabolical is that you are not told that you are experiencing trauma, functional freeze, Post Traumatic Slave Syndrome or CPTSD— and blame yourself for not being able to “get ahead”. Diabolical is that CPTSD wasn’t defined until enough white men were massacred in rich white men’s wars, or white girls kidnapped by sociopathic white men.
Diabolical are those damn “boot straps”.
Diabolical is how autism was a disorder until white boys started being diagnosed; or addiction was criminal until white children found their drug of choice. Diabolical is Black youth’s TV programming hyper-sexualizing them while TV programs with white casts emphasize “family values”, the innocence of white girls and always show 2-parent homes or other solid forms of family units (think Full House). Having to “Play ‘the game’” is diabolical— what is “the game”? The general understanding that rich people will never pay for their crimes is DIABOLICAL. And these things are not only diabolical by their nature, but by the timeline of their outcomes, the assumptions and social ramifications that follow, the schisms that rent some but not others, the insinuations that form, or the ones demonized that should not be in the long run.
Why don’t we recognize the diabolical?
As I said: it’s our “normal”. It’s all we know. In the USA cultures who are at war “come together” in the “melting pot”. Diabolical. Whites owe Black people reparations and an apology yet they have billions for the building of cop cities, $100 million state of the art prisons, and world class bombs to genocide Palestinians. Diabolical. Depravity is built into society as if a cultural expression, while vulgarity is celebrated as the same. Playing “the game” as a means of life and getting by means never holding evil accountable even when you’re seated at its boardroom table.
We live in a world where the wicked are rewarded; serial KILLERS get LIFE in prison and documentary features while victims get no closure and maybe a monetary settlement.
We’ve been taught to monetize the diabolical. We’ve been conditioned to celebrate it. On a personal level, many of us are in love with it: Sometimes the diabolical is the very thing you’ve attached to as your identity. The thing you value most but that’s actually a wound, a doorway, a hindrance to your moving forward.
Another major reason we cannot discern the diabolical? CHRISTIANITY. And while many of us are not christians, the principles, values and spirit of that genocidal brainwashing cult reigns this system. Under the name of christianity everything from slavery to genocide has been excused. Christian men have held offices and have committed adultery, signed dehumanizing laws, revoked treaties with indigenous tribes, served in prison for heinous economic crimes, pardoned corporations that have poisoned land and water, etc. And here are some fundamental beliefs from this religion that have conditioned many of us:
Diabolical Christian concepts/ spells/ curses.
Forgive— everyone, of anything. God is a god of restoration without judgment.
To remind is to recall sins and that is remembering what god himself forgot
bless your enemy
Pray for those who persecute you
Wait out wrongdoing
“Love” keeps no record of wrongs
Be wearisome of revenge
Never praying against systems of oppression
Mingle with your enemy because we are “all one”
Dysfunction is protected so long as you are rich
There’s no talking about the things that keep people bound and arrested such as molestation, overwhelm, post traumatic slave syndrome, generational pain, etc
– the ultimate DESIGN of christianity is the perpetuation of capitalism. So nothing else can matter except getting you high on jesus worship and being encouraged to go back to work and to not questioning things your pastor told you are in god’s hands, but are connected to puppet strings, loose threads that must be pulled to unravel evils, and spiritual dynamite.
These are examples of belief systems that have made us more comfortable with the devil’s presence as standard— that have caused us to create internal and external environments where diabolical ideas and beings can be safe, and that have dimmed our understanding of how the devil manifests. One of the most diabolical elements of christianity is how it conditions us to be comfortable with injustice.
What does injustice look like?
“Moving on” without apology… this filters into our daily lives
Withholding of our history
We do not know the depths of depravity of the colonizer, and this is to our undoing. (mention books read)
When you don’t know the diabolical in your history you will unknowingly make a mortal enemy a friend; go where you should stay away from, or marry into a bloodline that was the terrorizer of your ancestors
Fear of grief
Laboring for love
Shrugging at sinister things because they’re “over there”
Lack of rest and love of work as a means of proving value when our ancestors worked tortuosly
No reparations, and still we labor on collaboration with the very system that once enslaved us
Knowing there are segregated neighborhoods, food deserts, etc. and being ok with it by design
The platforming of violent men and women.
Being encouraged to distance white people from their evil context while Black people are persistently placed in the context of disenfranchisement…
Morbidity of coexisting w/ our enemies
Tolerating violence but intolerance for hating the violent
Having to behold the wicked get rewarded
Lynching. Literal and metaphorical.
In the sweet by and by… comes “heaven” while colonizers build theirs on earth at your expense
Being made the laughing stock of the world with degrading media perpetuating stereotypes when YOU were the people group enslaved…
These and more are ways christianity has kept us from understanding the diabolical. Let’s be clear: white people made blood covenants to have what they have. From genocide to lynching to the torure of enslavement. They are a DIABOLICAL people and we live in their DIABOLICAL system, which subscribes to the worship of their diabolical god, named jesus. The vigilance required from us is to not allow their pattern of devilishness enter our minds as NORMAL and to live in such a way where our vigilance prevents their backwardsness from deviating us from our Divine, ancestral focus. Allyship with the diabolical removes us from the table of authority with our ancestors and the Divine.
Speaking of, the next conditioning that christianity gives us is the energetically wearisome patience to deal with dysfunction. One of the most overt traits of the devil is chaos and confusion. Yet these don’t always manifest as wild parties or not knowing which way to turn. They manifest as the bending against your conscience, protecting violent people because they’re in your “network” (and you “dont know that side of them” or that thing they did “has nothing to do with you…”), sharing space (ie the workplace) with unremoreseful people; operating against your healing, hopefulness, sacredness, and undermining your discernment and authority.
