what's happening IN you

You're not insouciant because you choose to pause and process in the middle of your storm. You're not being apathetic because you choose optimism instead of "being realistic" about where you are. Choosing to feel your feelings and take note of your location is an act of active participation in narrative building. You can be hyper-focused on the harshness of your reality and react accordingly. Or you can focus on what's happening IN you and build accordingly. The choice is embedded in every circumstance.